I don’t know how many times I’ve heard this. But it’s a lot. Someone gives a presentation and says there’ll be time for Q&A at the end. Then they say something like, “And remember…there are no stupid questions.”
But there ARE stupid questions. Plenty of them.
And it’s uncanny (but not surprising) how so many of them start with “why.” Sad, too. Because a lot of the “why’s” lead to lies.
And I know that sounds harsh. But it’s so easy to get a lying response when you ask “why.”
When you seek answers to astronomy, or geography, or biology, or any other ology, it’s OK (recommended) to ask why…and why not. But in relationships, why tends to be the most counter-productive question.
Most of the time the response is just something the other person thinks you want to hear. Or they get defensive and simply answer with another why question.
“Why” doesn’t look like what you find in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. Because why doesn’t suffer long and isn’t kind. Why IS envious. And it DOES parade itself around demanding to be answered. Why IS puffed up and behaves rudely. Because it assumes it’s the only worthy question. And why IS provoked easily and seeks its own.
Also…”why” generally assumes the worst.
Why isn’t patient. So it strays far from the peace found in other questions. Where? Who? What? And When? And why makes you forget there’s a day after today. In fact, why says that even if there is a day after today, it will still need to be answered.
Why is not the question for so many reasons. I’m gonna share some of my lyrics from 27 years ago. Notice how the words focused on “why”. The guy who wrote those words, back then, could not see the guy writing these words, today. And he couldn’t see the answers that have now replaced those stupid questions. And he couldn’t see because he stood firmly behind a big, fat, giant…
Why?
I pause; I wonder…
And I see myself through a magnifying glass.
And I ask a question…
I give myself a test that I might never pass.
I yearn for freedom;
And I don’t belong in a complicated life
My needs are simple;
A mountain home and perhaps a loving wife.
So why can’t I make this happen?
Why don’t my dreams come true?
And why is the picture always fading?
Why can’t I change my view?
Why don’t things change no matter how I try?
And why do I constantly ask myself why?
I sit…I listen
And try to hear all the music in my head.
A song; a feeling
I need someone to understand what I’ve said.
When I’m being optimistic
I know I’ll be fine.
Asking why is realistic;
Knowing why…divine.
© 1987 Tony Funderburk
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