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I watched Brian Regan, one of the truly best comedians ever, do a bit about comparing anything you do to one of the astronauts who walked on the moon. It’s hilarious. When you get a chance, just do a search for Brian Regan man on the moon on YouTube.Yeah. How does your best accomplishment compare to being a man on the moon?
Funny stuff. And I love how Brian doesn’t resort to profanity. Plus, his facial expressions are top-notch. And that reminds me of the first time I ever heard of him.
Elgielene and I went to a movie, back in the late 90’s, and they showed comedy clips before the main show. One of those clips was of Brian talking about how he says “you too” at the wrong times. Look that bit up, too.
Anyway.
Let’s get back to the man on the moon.
But let’s don’t talk about some boring moon walk. That’s old hat, old news, and old school. Because of this press release:
Dateline: May 11, 2024 / 12:57 PM CDT – HARLINGEN, Texas – NASA announced it is aiming to build the first railway system on the moon. “We want to build the first lunar railway system, which will provide reliable, autonomous, and efficient payload transport on the Moon,” a post by Ethan Schaler, with the NASA Jet Propulsion Laboratory stated.
Whoa! People get ready! There’s a train a’comin’. That’s gonna leave The Impressions…I mean, an impression. Just imagine. A railway system on THE MOON.
OK, let’s set aside, for the time being, the fact that most cities don’t maintain potholes and bridges properly. And let’s focus on the positive side of this railway system. After all, it’s gonna be reliable, autonomous, and efficient payload transport. So, you won’t have to worry about any man on the Moon. He’ll have excellent transportation at his disposal.
And even better than that? It’s gonna have a cool acronym, aka: name. FLOAT. Ain’t that somethin’? And that stands for “Flexible Levitation on a Track.” Bam! Score! It’s a slam-dunk for the marketing department.
Sure, they’ve got some time to work on it since the “daily operations of a sustainable lunar base” will be in the 2030’s. Plus, they’ll use so-called “artificial intelligence,” which, in this case, will be “unpowered magnetic robots that levitate over a film track.” Hmm, I’m not sure how “unpowered” robots can do that.
But maybe that’s just me.
Now, lest you think your tax dollars will be wasted on such looney, er, lunar activity, here’s something you should know. According to the press release: “The system will transport payloads around the base to and from landing zones and other outposts. The aim is to also transport lunar soil from mining locations to be used for extraction or construction.”
So, rest easy. They’re gonna move moon dirt around and maybe use it to build stuff. So, cool. Right? And obviously, the need is great for reliable “unpowered magnetic robots.” Because “FLOAT will operate autonomously in the dusty, inhospitable lunar environment with minimal site preparation.”
Well, I don’t know about you, but I hope I can hang in there long enough for a trip to that “dusty, inhospitable lunar environment.” If I don’t, there’s always Death Valley National Park. But that’s so twentieth century.
So be it. I’m connected to the twentieth century enough to have enough sense to know Earth is a good place to live and the moon isn’t even a good place to work. And that’s why any man on the moon references I’ll make will be confined to the world of the imagination.
Feel the cool night air
Dancing through your hair.
Laugh right out loud and then watch
Stars light up everywhere.
Look up with your arms open wide,
And you will Catch The Moon.
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Stay tuned,