Mateo walked through the shin-deep snow on that cold February night in 1996. And one thought kept echoing through the dark chambers of his mind, “I can hear my heart, but I just can’t feel my life.”
But he couldn’t figure out what “feel my life” meant.
Because it wasn’t like he had NO feelings. Of course he had feelings. Lots of ’em. Passionately exasperating feelings. But feelings just the same.
And, after another mile, or so, of trudging through the snow, Mateo heard his own voice say, “I can feel you cut, but I just can’t see the knife.”
What?! He nearly slipped and fell as he quickly turned to look behind him. No one there. But why would there be? The voice was clearly his own. After all, he’d lived long enough to recognize the sound of his own voice, thank you very much.
But why would his own voice taunt him with talk about feeling the cut but not seeing the knife? That was serious cloak and dagger stuff right there.
So, he gathered up the small amount of logic his brain could muster in that moment, and he started to pray, “Dear God, would You slip Yourself inside of me, now, and show me what I’m meant to be? My heart feels like a dark, locked box. Would you please use the golden key of your Word to unlock it. And protect me from the wizardry of this dark, fallen world down here?”
And he added,
“Even though, right now, I can’t feel my life, I CAN feel Your love.”
Mateo knew God’s love was real even though he’d never met Him face to face.
Faith.
Yeah, that’s what they call it. So, he thought to himself, “Faith knows that whenever I’m alone, You still fill the empty space. And faith helps me know I never really have to reach for You, Lord. Because You always seem to pull me through. And You do the things that I can’t do. Not even if I wanted to. And not even if I tried.
As those words flooded into his mind, his doubts and worries started to fade away, like the dwindling snowflakes in the frigid, night air.
So, he tapped into the source of his strength. And he sang,
I have to believe You did everything for me.
‘Cause what I have to believe is the truth that sets me free.
Then, he said out loud, “Now, I know why I couldn’t feel my life. Because I forgot my life is not my own. No, God spent more than the whole world could ever repay to buy my life. And I’m sure I don’t deserve it. But, now, I’m lighter than air and soaring like a bird.”
OK, there’s a glimpse into part of one night in the life of Mateo.
By the way, his name means “Gift from God.” And He sprang to life just a few minutes ago when I decided to create his moment of angst to point to the song, “Have To Believe.” It’s the first song in the Do Right collection.
You’ve heard of the Do Right collection, no doubt. Because you’re familiar with how the whole collection is somewhat connected to a local Denver night time talk show host from way back. Right? You know that story. Right?
Well, it doesn’t matter if you do right now. Because right now I’m telling you how to get your own digital download of the Do Right Songbook Journal. And when you get your own copy, you’ll get all the lyrics to all the songs. Plus, there are tons of pages where you can journal, take notes in church, or just doodle if you prefer. AND you can download all the songs (at no extra charge) from a secret link in the book.
Just go to the Rhyme and Reason Bookshop and get yours today.
https://www.tonyfunderburk.com/rhyme-and-reason-bookshop
I’ll wait here and…
Stay tuned…
P.S. If you already have your copy of this classic music, refer the link to someone else. Thanks!