Here’s something I didn’t learn from my Dad: It’s important that certain traits are taught alongside empathy. Because they foster respect for all genders and emotional intelligence which helps ensure that masculinity is not reduced to harmful stereotypes. And that can encourage a spectrum of positive attributes that can benefit everyone.
So, what do you think of me now?
Surprised by the respect for all genders part?
Yeah, that’s definitely not me or my view, or the scientific view, at all. When you say “all genders,” and you mean more than two, you’re incorrect. Period.
I read that blurb I shared with you (up at the top) in a report about how to raise boys with a “positive understanding of masculinity.” And it seems slightly wacky that you’d have to even consider how to raise boys with a positive understanding of masculinity. Because, over the years of my life, it was the most natural thing in the world. Boys like being boys.
Yeah, there are circumstances that can influence that natural occurrence. And the most damaging circumstance is almost always when there’s no man in the house as the boy is growing up. Because moms, as awesome as they are, don’t know how to be men.
And if you don’t know how to do or be something, you can’t very well teach someone else. But a boy doesn’t just need any ol’ man around the house. He needs a man who also had a man’s influence. And the best influence comes from the man who’s the father.
But a father might be one of those two genders only guys.
So, what do you do if that’s the case? Celebrate. Because at least he knows that truth. But maybe you end up with a father who’s not a good man. Uh-oh. What then?
I can tell “what then” from experience. Because my dad was not a good man.
“Gasp! But Tony, you’ve quoted your Dad. And you’ve written songs about his influence on you. How can you drop this bomb now?”
Easy. It’s true.
And here’s the thing. Your dad is/was not a good man either.
Boom! How’s that for dropping bombs?!
But hang in there. It gets worse before it gets better. There ain’t NO good men.
In fact, there was only one man, who ever lived on Earth, who had a good Father. That was Adam. And he rebelled against his Father. So, evidently even having a good father (translate: Perfect Holy and Righteous Father) doesn’t necessarily lead to a positive understanding of masculinity.
God created Adam and Eve (all the genders).
Then, He did something only a true loving Creator would do. He gave them their own will. Their own ability to choose to love Him and be good. Or choose themselves and the consequences that would come with that.
I’m sure I don’t have to tell you what they did. And what happened to everyone else after that. But maybe you don’t connect what that has to do with a boy’s masculinity.
If not, be sure to remind me to share more about it soon. In the meantime, remember to share this with kids so they never forget:
There’s a life inside of you, and it comes from God,
And He wants you to live and to always enjoy
And remember He made you the person you are,
Yes, a girl is a girl and a boy is a boy.
And that’s all genders accounted for.
Take a second and join the growing body of believers who’ve already signed up for the FunderFlash Journal. When you do, I’ll send you links to 2 songs and 2 books that adults AND kids enjoy right away. Then, I’ll send you flashes of light from the faith, hope, and the power of God’s love.
Stay tuned,
